hey-i stumbled on this community through reading andrea's writing...which by the way is amazing. I mostly just write poems and i regret that i get stuck reading school books instead of others that would increase my vocab etc. I love reading other people's writing. I love the depth of writing. Anyways...i don't really let other people read my poetry because it's a serious and personal part of who i am but i'm interested in seeing what people think and i'm finally getting some courage to share. I hope all of you enjoy as much as i enjoy reading your writing.
I wrote this tonight/today? missing someone...
( Peel Back The RindCollapse )
i may change and add more later...
Here is something I wrote for one of my classes last fall. It's based on a 1970s song called "We Just Disagree" by Dave Mason.
Dave sat on the old recliner in his rundown apartment. He had been plucking away at his guitar all day long trying to come up with the song that would make him a star. Dave had even taken the school year off to dedicate himself to writing a hit song. This was to be his senior year.
“I can always go back,” Dave would defend himself to his family and friends about his decision. “I can’t live my life asking myself ‘what if?’”
Everyone in his life appeared to support his decision. Everyone but one person: his live-in girlfriend, Laurie. Dave and Laurie had been dating since the beginning of their freshmen year at University of Delaware. Despite their differences, they hit it off immediately. Laurie was a pre-law major with the goal of going to a prestigious law school and Dave was an aimless wanna be rock star. The only reason he was even attending college was to have his parents support him for the next few years.
After their sophomore year, the couple decided to move in together. At the time, Dave and Laurie thought it was just the first step into a happy life together. Unknown to them, it was the beginning of the end.
Once they had moved in together, their personalities began to clash. Dave was more concerned about his music than school. He would sleep instead of going to class because he would stay up the night before trying to pen a song together. At first, Laurie tried to be supportive of his musical endeavors. Being the school-orientated person she was Laurie could not understand why Dave did not take school as seriously as his music. The fight was the same almost every time.
“You need to go to class! You have to study! You have to do that history paper, NOW! Your stupid music can wait!” Laurie would always scream at Dave. “You’ll never get anywhere in life if you don’t graduate. You’ll be one of those bums on the street playing your damn guitar for money!”
“My music isn’t stupid, Laurie. School will always be there. It’s not the most important thing in the world. Just because your stuck up, snotty ass wants to be some hotshot attorney, doesn’t mean the rest of us have to waste our time sitting in a classroom.”
The last fight was over a week ago. Laurie had taken some of her belongings and went to stay with her best friend. Dave tried to forget about her and poured himself into his songwriting.
Just as Dave crumbled up his last sheet of his latest attempt of lyrics to throw across the living room, there was a knock on the door.
“Who could that be?” Dave asked himself. It’s 1 A.M. The bars are still open.”
“I’m sorry to bother you so late. Oh wait, you’re always up at this hour, doing that music thing of yours.”
“Nice to see you, too, Laurie. What do I owe this visit?”
“I just wanted to get the rest of my stuff. Is that okay with you, piano man?”
“I don’t play the piano. It’s the guitar. I thought you would know that by now. But what do I expect from someone that the only thing on their mind is legal briefs.”
“Alright, Dave. I’m sorry about the piano man dig. I didn’t come here to fight. I just want to get the rest of my things.”
As Laurie was in their bedroom packing, Dave sit down and smoothed out his crumbled up piece of paper. Some inspiration had finally hit him.
“Been away, haven’t seen you in awhile.
How’ve you been?”
“Not to shabby for 1 A.M.” Dave said aloud to himself.
Dave put down his pencil and went to the bedroom. He didn’t know exactly why he wanted to do such a thing. Despite still having feelings for Laurie, he had no actual desire to work things out with her. They were too different. He was a music man. She was a future lawyer. Those two things just don’t mesh.
“Hey!” Dave shouted as he walked into the bedroom. “You look different.”
“What do you mean?” asked Laurie.
“Well, you’ll usually all dolled up, make up on, hair done real nice. Designer clothing. But here you are, an UDel sweat shirt and sweat pants. It’s just amazing here you changed in a week.”
“Now that we’re not together, I didn’t think it mattered. I just came for my things.”
“It’s not that big of a deal. Just commenting.”
Dave walked out of the room with a little more inspiration for his song.
“Have you changed your style and do you think that we’ve grown up differently?”
Don’t seem the same, seems like you’ve lost your feel for me.”
“So, let’s leave it alone
‘Cause we can’t see eye to eye
There ain’t no good guy
There ain’t no bad guy
There’s only you and me and we just disagree”
“Yes! I think this is finally going somewhere!” Dave thought to himself.
“Earth to Dave!” shouted Laurie. “Do you think we can call a truce long enough for you to help me carry my things to my car?”
“Sure. I could use a break.”
“What’s this you’re working on?”
“Just one of my stupid songs.”
”If you ever make it big on this song, I guess you can I helped.”
Dave just stood there and smiled.
“So, where are you staying?” asked Dave as they walked to Laurie’s car.
“With Joy for now. Then, I’m moving into my own place. Why do you care?”
“I don’t. Just being nice.”
“Are you staying here? Not that I care,” asked Laurie.
“I’m moving back to my parents when the lease is up.”
“That’s several hundred miles away.”
“Yeah, but I need a place ‘til I figure stuff out.”
“You can figure it out at school.”
“Laurie, let’s not go though this again. How many times have we fought over this? Now, look at us. There’s not even an us anymore.”
“I just think you really ought to rethinking dropping out of school. Goodbye, Dave”
Dave walked back up to his apartment. He couldn’t wait to the lease was up on the apartment. There were too many painful memories. But, painful memories lead to lyrics.
“I’m going back to a place that’s faraway
How bout you?
Have you got a place to stay?
Why should I care?
When I’m just trying to get along
We were friends but now it’s the end of our love song”
“I will just add the chorus two more times at the end and it will be finished,” Dave said aloud to himself. He realized he was alone. With that thought, he went to bed.
5 years later….
Laurie sat at her desk in a prestigious law firm she worked for in Manhattan. After college, she got accepted to her first choice law school: Columbia School of Law. With a few minutes to kill before her next client, Laurie checked her email. In her inbox, there was an email from her best friend Joy.
“Hi, Laurie. I was in my car last night with the radio on. This new song “We Just Disagree” came on. None other than your ex Dave Mason is the singer. Holy crap! He made it! Looks like you were wrong. LOL! Well, got to go. Lunch on Saturday?
“Well I’ll be damned,” she thought to herself. “The piano man did it.”
Just before Laurie could log off, another email came. This one was from her brother.
“Hey sis! That dude you just to date has a hit single. He’s doing an autograph signing at the Galleria. Just for kicks, you should go.”
The next Saturday, Laurie went into her local mall to purchase Dave’s new single and then headed to the location he was signing autographs. The line was long, very long, mostly filled with teeny boppers. Finally, it was Laurie’s turn.
“Hi,” was the only thing Laurie could mustard up to say to Dave.
Dave sat there unable to speak. The girl who broke his heart, inspired his hit song, was standing there in front of him.
Finally, Dave managed to say “Hey.”
“May I have your autograph?”
“Sure. That’s why I’m here,” he replied with a smile.
“I just want to know I’m proud of you. You proved me wrong.”
“Thanks. That means a lot. I just wanted to let you know, I did go back. The next school year, I finished up my degree in music education. I even taught in a high school for a few years.”
“Thanks. Here you go,” Dave said as he handed her the C.D.
“Thanks. Well, goodbye.”
ahhh...I screwed my first post up :( sorry. (Ignore it please, or maybe delete it, I don't know how...) ok, I'm introducing myself now: My name's Kate, I eat paper and I'm 16 XI'M HARDCOREX My favorite writers are John Steinbeck, Walt Whitman, Sylvia PLath, William Faulkner, Chuck P., Emily Dickinson, Robert Lowell, etc. I don't do anything.
Name of Piece: I don't have one yet
I don't have a title for this yet...but I want to know what you think, thanks
In my small form
Trying to melt away
Or scatter into tiny ants
Crawling into walls, loosing themselves
In cracked bark
And feeding off the microscopic leavings
of a well-mannered families early lunch.
You come by, silently and stand
As usual, right above me, shadowing
My view and looking down in a disapproving stare
But then with a sly grin,
You creep beside me
Moving my limbs about and my head--
Trying to positon and prop me
Just how you want, in the perfect place
For the picture you have stuck
in your mind, too bitter to erase
Squeezing yourself into the small
Crevass between cold steel
And I, you run
Thoughts through your mind and fingers
Through your hair
On the color of my nails
And the length of my hair
Stun me. It pinches me
To know you see my eyes
But still sit
Beside my trembling body expecting
Than a clear, dull silence
Or a weak scream echoing.